hands tied with fools pride.
in a slowly fleeing summer.
empty rooms don't have pictures to talk to.
brickwall views demand uninspired afternoons.
the days are flooding into months.
the nights are staring into centuries.
i've got some older pictures of people i see once every couple years.
intrigued or unamazed.
"you were so much different back in those days." and now this smile has a bitter curve.
now these eyes are unenchanted.
and all we see is a faded image of what we used to be.
how can we relate when we don't know a thing about each other anymore?
is there a gesture i could use to clearly express i'm at an utter loss for words.
I've frequently seen people post to their blogs, random lyrics to random song, by random artists. If anyone really wanted to have this information, I bet they could type "lyrics" into Google and waste tons of time. To you out there, that person who randomly posts song lyrics onto your web site I offer you two suggestions:
- Write why you're posting said lyrics. The lyrics mean nothing if you can't put up the effort to write about what they mean to you, why you like them or why the band who wrote them sucks.
With that said...
I was driving to work today and in my CD player where I have: three Lawrence Arms, one Nekromantics and one Benny Benassi CD, track six of The Lawrence Arm's "Apatthy and Exhaustion" album came on, excepted above. I felt it really captured a lot of what I was feeling in Chicago when I visited last.
Six years ago, we were all very different people. Some would say we weren't people, or that we're not very good people and even that we were terrible caricatures of grown ups. Thats what happens when you're a teenager. You're this funny looking creature created by a street artist taking aspects into your own of all sorts of messed up big nosed, giant forheaded, crazy eyed wierdness. We all were ignorant of this fact and went about our lives.
In this time we found in eachother companionship and compassion, as time progresses we all change and a lot of us have changed in vastly differing ways. We found solstace in our assocaites and friends. There are people who years ago I felt I couldn't live without whom today I feel absolutely disgusted with seeing. This is not a fault of those people . . . entirely, nor mine . . . entirely. We change, and as the story goes the glee from ages ago is being replaced by bitterness and anger. It sickens me to see things this way and I don't want anything to do with it. I won't even ask if "its too much," that people can spend time in the same universe as one another without bitterness, hatred and cruelty soaking up every last iota of worthwhile conversation, debate or discussion. There is no question about it. Sometimes people are human and those are the people I like to spend time with.
I don't want this to seem like a jab against anyone because all I am doing right now is writing about an observation I saw while spending 7 days in Illinois. This does not make anyone a "bad person," to anyone but me. Everyone can continue about their lives, unhappy or not and choose whether they want to let their lives be defined by the hours they spend holed up in a bitter, uninspired and unworthy corner or if they want to suck it up and find ways to enjoy life. When you'r enjoying life, that is when I'll want to see you, even if life isn't entirely happy as long as you have something besides the various forms of "I hate my life," I'll be happy to make conversation with you. Hell, if you want to grab a pint, a coke or a slushie and watch a movie I'm game.
Back to the Chicago trip.
Thanks to everyone who I had a chance to hang out with, too long or too short I'm quite sure it wasn't the ratio I wanted. To the people I didn't see, sorry about that. Next time! Next time! Thanks to everyone for taking time out of their schedules to see some crazy guy from Taiwan who was visiting Illinois for an odd spell. The movie was cool, not drinking at a pool hall was fun and man-o-man, I didn't think a not-a-picnic could be so awesome. By the way, there are still over sixty architecture tours in Chicago I haven't been on, so if you're interested feel free to sign me up as long as I'm in the state. De will attest that it is fun to walk around the city and look at interesting buildings! Special thanks goes out to my family for not minding too much when I spent too much time with my friends and not enough with my blood.
P.S. There is another song by The Lawrence Arms where they sing a haiku. It is quite clever and I dare you to find it out!